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Tyson to visit York

Students of York University beware; the world's favourite sociopathic boxer / ear-munching rapist is planning to visit our historic city next week as part of a country-wide, whirlwind tour of UK.

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Students of York University beware; the world's favourite sociopathic boxer / ear-munching rapist is planning to visit our historic city next week as part of a country-wide, whirlwind tour of UK.

The former world heavyweight champion "Iron" Mike Tyson, who once intentionally knocked out the referee in order to continue punching his opponent, has hung up his gloves, but sadly is still intent on terrorising the inhabitants of York.

Considered in his prime to be one of the most destructive boxers ever, the controversial former champion plans to take in the city's historic tourist attractions, including Clifford's Tower and the Minster, as part of a two-day visit to Yorkshire. However, this could all change. The soon-to-be sightseer has received a formidable challenge from local barber Terry Smith, who has announced that he wants to take Tyson on in the ring, and more importantly is convinced that he would win.

"I reckon I could beat him with my eyes closed and with one arm tied behind my back," said the 'Classic Cutz' hairdresser before adding: "Come on, if you think you're hard enough!"

I think it is safe to say that Fireworks Night is by no means over. But has the brave (or rather stupid, depending on how you look at it) suburban snipper of Heworth realised what he's letting himself in for? "Iron" Mike is of course the man famous for saying "When I fight someone, I want to break his will. I want to take his manhood. I want to rip out his heart and show it to him...I put guys in body bags."

So, will it be Tyson vs Terry: the Baddest Man On The Planet vs the Baddest Barber On The Planet? Perhaps not, although armed with a hairbrush and a pair of scissors Terry Smith could be a match for even the most destructive pugilist.

(Anna Bevan)

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